Another realization

It was a nice, sunny Easter Monday so Will called in sick and we took the boys to the zoo. Let me just clarify, I don't do zoos. I do not like the smell of animals and animal poop. I don't like animals that have grey feathers or fur or green slimy skins on them. Which pretty much sums up the whole zoo. Well, maybe except for the zebras, leopards or crocodiles. That I like. Preferably in a size 8 ballet flats or maybe a tote or a belt? I kid, I kid! But I decided to take them because I am a good mommy and that's what we do. We sacrifice our own fears for our childrens' needs. Actually Will might say that it's because I need to bribe them so that I can go shopping afterwards and I would have leverage when they whine. But don't listen to him, what does he know about the sacrifices us moms make? But it did make shopping easier for me that afternoon.

I learned an important thing that day. It was an eye-opening experience. I've learned that I am not that kind of mom.

Let me clarify:

that kind of mom: they all had backpacks with snacks, change of clothes, juice boxes and first aid kit.
me:

I had my Hello Kitty mirror, air freshner (just in case the kids poop or fart and we need to "freshen" the air), Hello Kitty nail cutter, gum (another good thing to bribe the kids with), Hello Kitty pill box (I bring Advil with me because Will gets headaches when we are at malls. I would like to come prepared!) and a cute bottle of perfume, just because the bottle is so cute!

that kind of mom: Their kids smelled like sunscreen.
me: I would've put sunscreen on the boys except that the bottle we have at home expired two years ago.

that kind of mom: They wore sensible clothes. You know jeans, hoodie and birkinstock sandals, some wore runners.
me: I wore white and flip flops



that kind of mom: They fed their kids veggie sticks, cheese and crackers and water.
me: We had A&W that day. Grandma burger, onion rings, fries and rootbeer to be exact. Almost wanted to high five the other Asian family sitting close to us in the picnic area eating McDonalds!

that kind of mom: They looked at each cage and read all the animal description with their kids.
me:

Yup, that's me sitting on the bench playing with my itouch. Not really sure where the kids were at this point. On the plus side, I am now on the assistant manager level on my SkyBurger game!

It made me feel bad about my parenting skills for a second. I got over it really quick though because I know I am a good mom. My kids might eat candy and junk food once in a while, they might start to throw temper tantrums, they might whine and complain when I ask them to do their chores, they might sometimes watch TV all day instead of playing outside, but they are happy and healthy, they are respectful, loving and well behaved, and most of all they are MY kids!

The Ugly Truth

Can I just be serious for a minute? When I first started toying with the notion of having a blog, it was mainly an outlet for me. Something that can pre-occupy my mind, something to look forward to, something for me that's me. I decided early on that I would make it light-hearted, no matter how sad, annoyed, excited, frustrated I may be. Well, that's not going to be the case today. Today would be a pour my heat out, tears running down my cheeks, snot dripping off my nose, ugly cry kind of post.

Kinda like this...


I HATE not being able to get pregnant. I hate feeling disappointed month after month. I hate the feeling of resentment, bitterness and jealousy I get when I see pregnant women. I want to wipe off their smug smiles while they rub their tummies gloating. I want to get a needle and pop their pregnant bellies.

Oh no you didn't just go there. Yup, I did. I went there.

The thing is, I HATE feeling this way. Some days it's harder to tell myself that tomorrow would be a better day. I'm tired of falling and getting back up. Sometimes I just want to lie there til somebody runs me over.



Okay maybe I don't really do the cry your heart out routine. I tried though.

One day soon, we'll get pregnant. It'll be our turn. But in the meantime, let me wallow in pure shallow, materialistic happiness and self-pity.

Now off to Holt Renfrew I go to BUY some happiness. Haha!

The people of facebook

Ah, facebook. What would I ever do without you? How would I be able to spy casually check my ex boyfriends' profiles, be on top of the latest news or stalk my friends' pictures? Eyelahvittt!! It's like legalalized snooping. It makes me feel special, like people are actually interested in my status updates. Which made me think about the people of facebook There are many kinds out there. And here they are:

THE DRAMA QUEEN

EVERYTHING that could possibly happen happened to them but always a hundred times better or worse.

"OMG!!!!!!!OMG!!!!!!OMG!!!!!!!! I was just rushed to the hospital because I had a paper cut and doctors just found out I had Scarlett fever!!!!!!!!"

THE INFORMER

You know the one that posts their every move.

"woke up, check"
"brushed my teeth, check"
"dishes, check"
"vacuuming, check"
"watching TV, check"
"laundry, check"
"dinner, check"
"pooping, check" (updated via iphone)

THE HARDCORE FACEBOOKER

The one who comments on everybody's status, "likes" everybody's comments and joins every group and pages there are.

THE EMOTIONAL FACBOOKER

You know their posts were written while listening to Celine Dion's All By Myself



THE BRAGGER

The one that posts everything she has.

Case in point...haha! What? I'm just proud of my stuff.


So there, now that you know the people of facebook, which one are you?

Me? I'm all of the above!

day from hell

OH.MY.GOD.

Today should've been a happy, happy, joy, joy kind of day. After all, it's my son's 10th birthday.

But it wasn't.

I might have crammed a little too much activities in one day: lunch at Bonanza, science center and West Edmonton waterpark. The waterpark closes at 7pm and we got there at 5:15 pm. I thought, no problem, an hour and forty five minutes should be just enough time to tire the kids out to enjoy swimming.

But this is what happened.

1. We parked on the wrong side of West Edmonton Mall. For those who haven't been there, they have 58 entrances. We couldn't have parked further from the waterpark entrance if we tried. I thought, that's okay, we still have an hour and forty five. Nope. Know what irritates me at malls? When people walk in a row blocking the whole aisle. And they don't walk fast either. I'm normally a patient person when it comes to stuff like this. The mall is my happy place, after all. But today, I might have yelled patiently said, "For the love of God, MOVE!" And they did..

2. Never again would I buy shoes for $6.00. There's a reason why there were a shit load of them on clearance. About halfway to the waterpark was when I decided to hurl them across the mall. Okay I didn't but I almost did. The back of my ankles are raw. I would've taken a picture of it to show you but I didn't want to gross you out. Okay I do, why should I suffer alone? But I just couldn't walk to get the camera right now, my feet still hurts. But despite the agony, we made it to the waterpark at 5:30pm. Yes, we "power walked" for 15 minutes. That's how big this mall is.

3. And since men just couldn't multitask the way mothers can, I decided to take Zach with me to the ladies room while Will takes Kyle and his friend with him to the mens change room. Oh, did I forget to mention we took one of Kyle's friend with us? Know what they say about girls talking too much? Well boys do too. In fact, they literally DID NOT STOP TALKING for twelve hours.
So anyways, guess whose bag I ended up taking with me to the change room. I wanted to rip my clothes off "incredible hulk" style when I realized I had taken Will's swim pants instead. I could just imagine how much more embarassing it was for him taking out a bikini. ***snicker*** So it probably took another 10 minutes looking for each other so we could trade bags.

4. Finally, around quarter to, we were in the water. It was nice. The water was warm, there was a gentle wave, the kids were happy...

Until the lifeguards kicked everybody out of the water at 6:00pm as there was an "accident". No, nobody drowned or got hurt. It's that kind of "accident". Kind of like the "accident" Zach had a few minutes later. But I will get to that part in a bit here. They had to shut down the pool area because it was contaminated. At this point, I'm seething. Are you kidding me? We paid $120.00 so we can "wade" in the kiddie pool for an hour? But that's not the best part...

5. Zach had an accident in his pants. Enough said. I'm just glad he wasn't anywhere near the water at the time. I'm pretty sure he doesn't appreciate me telling this to everyone. But tough shit!***snicker***

So here I am now, in the comfort of my own home. A bottle glass of wine in my hand. The only consolation that I have (and the only one that I need) is when the kids said "we had the bestest time ever" before they fell asleep.